I received this in my mail this morning:
From:JOSEPH JONATHAN
Spain, Europe.
Reply to: sfjonathan7@gmail.com
Dear Sir,
Permit me to inform you of my desire of going into business relationship with you. I got your name and contact from an international brochure because I do not know anybody I will contact. I prayed over it and believed that you will be a reputable and trust worthy person that I can trust and do business with, I must not hesitate to confide in you for this simple and sincere business assistance. I am Joseph Jonathan the only son of late Mr. and Mrs. Richard Mabel Jonathan of blessed memory.
My father until his untimely death was a very wealthy cocoa merchant in West Africa; my father was poisoned to death by his business associates on one of their outings on a business trip to our cocoa plantation in Abidjan a neighboring country from my country West Africa. My mother died when I was a baby and since then my father took me so special. Before the death of my father on 16th November, 2005 in a private hospital in Accra Ghana. He secretly called me on his bed side and told me that he has the sum of Five Million, Nine Hundred Thousand United State Dollars USD ($5,900, 000.00) he deposited with a private security firm in Spain, which he used my name his only son as the next of Kin in depositing of the money with the private security firm in Spain. The security firm is not aware that the box contains money and my father warned me to keep this as a top secret till I get a reliable foreigner that will assist me get the box out as his foreign partner. He also expla
Please, I am sincerely seeking your assistance in the following ways: (1) to assist me claim the box containing the money from the security company as my late father’s foreign partner. (2) To serve as a guardian of this fund. (3) To make arrangement for me to come over to your country to further my education and to secure a resident permit in your country because I cannot go back to my country till I am a full grown man.
Moreover, sir I will like you to tell me what you will take from the total sum as compensation for your effort/input after the successful release and transfer of this fund into your bank account in your country. Please you should indicate your interest towards assisting me by writing me an email at : sfjonathan7@gmail.com ,as I believe that this transaction would be concluded within seven days (7) days you signify interest to assist me. Please keep this proposal confidential.
Thanks and God bless.
Best regards,
Joseph Jonathan
What I love about these OBVIOUS scams is that they continue to become more and more colorful as the years progress. A wealthy cocoa farmer from Africa who was ultimately poisoned by a business partner. Joseph, his only son and only heir, was bequeathed Five Million, Nine Hundred Thousand United State Dollars, but for some reason, can’t take it out of the bank and needs my help.
What’s funny is that if you don’t have any sense about you, you’d easily fall for something like this not realizing that Abidjan is a city and is actually located in the country of Côte d’Ivoire, in Western Africa. Furthermore, while Accra is in Ghana and a neighboring country to Côte d’Ivoire, I don’t think “West Africa” is actually a country. It’s like North America isn’t a country; it’s several countries. West Africa is comprised of 16 smaller countries.
I like how detailed these scams are providing dates, places, real looking email addresses, and a pretty dramatic sob story: Mother dies when he’s little, Dad was poisoned, and now he can’t get his inheritance. You think, I’m listed in an international brochure? Wow! How’d that happen? Pretty vague and while I’d love to believe that I’m listed in some special brochure that reaches the eyes of wealthy Africans, there’s no way in hell. Seriously, who would believe this? Do people believe this? Are there really people out there who fall for this crap? There must be or else these scams wouldn’t continue to exist. All you have to do is ask yourself one question: Why wouldn’t a rich cocoa farmer have a will? If he really wanted his son to have the money, he’d of made a will or listed the boy as a joint account holder at the bank.
Anyway, it’s not real, so there’s no use speculating a will. But I mean, seriously…do people fall for this? Yes, because there’s a sucker born every minute. The major tip off is, first of all, why would a wealthy person half way across the world be contacting YOU? If the constant misspellings and inaccurate geography aren’t a tip off, you probably have more problems than recognizing inaccuracies in a random email. And secondly, where the fuck have you been the last 10 years? These scams have been going around as long as I’ve been on the interwebs – about 11 years now. Do the people who fall for this live in caves with no running water, electricity, or interwebs? You and I both know that if I were to, hypothetically, contact this Joseph person, there would indeed be some form of “send me money so I can send you money” thing going on. I wouldn’t send someone 5 dollars to send me 10 let alone several thousand dollars. Oh, and come on…whose last name is “Jonathan”? Even if someone contacted me with my long dead Mexican grandfather’s name, I’d have to assume it was a scam. He has plenty of heirs in Mexico that would come before me.
Good grief. I digress. This letter was one of the better ones I’d received in a long time and I especially like the poisoning angle. I weep for the people that continue to fall for these things, however. How sad. How sad indeed.