I figured out why I didn’t write a lot about New York the last time I was here…this city really takes a lot out of you. You give it willingly.

Last night AJB and I saw Liza Minnelli at The Palace. I know. You’re thinking, Liza Minnelli, WTF? No, seriously. Liza’s doing a short stint at The Palace, after a nasty divorce, two hip replacements, a knee replacement, and almost dying. That said, I honestly expected to see a little old granny standing on stage, waving her arms once and a while, and not anything like the Liza we know and love from Cabaret. Holy shit! Was I wrong! She’s 62 years old and thank God for stage lighting. She looked about 45. Not to mention dancing her ass off every night, she’s lost a lot of weight. While she is obviously older, she can’t quite kick as high, she brought it to the table. I mean, this lady gave every ounce of herself and sang her little heart out. Wow. AJB and I were flabbergasted. Flabbergasted!! It was like watching The Undiscovered Country where the ensign tells Cpt. Sulu that the ship will fly apart if they go anything further. Sulu responds, “Fly her apart then!” Oh yeah, just like that.

I’ve seen plenty of old timers make their comebacks on stage. What often amazes me is the sheer will power involved. When I see 60 year olds working like they’re 30, I feel like maybe I shouldn’t complain and maybe get up and do more things. Liza is truly a powerhouse. Yes, it’s true, she was a little more tired and her voice just ain’t what it used to be, but what you must realize, even taken down a few notches, she still manages to give the performance of a lifetime. This is the only show I’ve ever been to where the singer got a standing ovation after every song. She manages to talk to the audience as if we’re all old pals. She told us stories about her youth, momma, her God-Mother Kay Thompson, she even made jokes about her horrible divorce. If you don’t like Liza Minnelli, it’s because you’ve never seen her show. All I can really say is “Wow!” That lady has moxie! And she knows who her audience is: Older gay couples and old ladies. AJB and I fall into one of those categories, although we’re not sure which.

After Liza, we braved the cold, cold, streets of Times Square and had dinner at a steak house called Bond 45 – I can always find veggie foods at steak houses when put to the challenge. We then made our way to yet another show called Slava’s SnowShow. Slava is a Russian clown who, once upon a time, was part of Cirque du Soleil. So I was thinking, how bad could it be? Sorry to say, it was pretty bad. Boring as shit. Apparently people are saying this is the most beautiful show they’ve ever seen. I have to wonder if they’re talking about another show entirely. What parts are they talking about? The part where the clown walks across the stage excruciatingly slow? I fell asleep a few times and AJB woke me up to see the big finale. Ok, that was pretty great, but one great finale doesn’t make a whole show. All I know is, Slava was facing a wind machine, paper snow and smoke was flying out at the audience and that one song from Carmina Burana was playing as a super-bright light filled the room. Of course, it had nothing to do, whatsoever, with the entire show and didn’t actually mean anything. It was just random. No story, just small meaningless vignettes that weren’t actually funny.

Naturally, it’s hard to top Liza, so maybe anything I saw wouldn’t compare, but it wasn’t just that. Slava’s show sucked. I wish we’d gone to see Equus. At the very least we’d get some full frontal Daniel Radcliffe even if it comes with the poking of horses’ eyes out.

Today, it’s cold as shit, but we’re going to bundle up and see some things…in particular, the tree at Rockefeller Center. And what else? We’ll see.