Monthly Archives: July 2008

The Most Tedious Job Ever

Posted on by
Reply

Yesterday, during a lull in my day, I decided to tackle something I’d ignored for about 8 months. My blog SPAM. There were over 25,000 entries in the queue. Most, if not all, bloggers face an almost impossible onslaught of spammers hitting their comments sections. I use an application called WordPress to blog and it’s actually pretty great. It comes with all kinds of bells and whistles and is the reason why I switched over from Live Journal to begin with…more flexibility. With that comes the ability to mass edit/delete your comments. Still, when you’ve got over 25,000, it’s more than daunting.

I decided that I would not only go through all 25,000+ comments, but create a keyword blacklist containing words commonly used by spammers. For example:

Adderall
ambein
Ambien
Amoxicillin
animal sex
atenolol
Avandia
Biaxin
birkoff
Bontril
Carisoprodol
Celebrex
Celexa
Cephalexin
CheapAdobePremiumSuite
Cialis
cipro
Codeine
Cyclobenzaprine
Cymbalta
Diazepam
diethylpropion
Diflucan
Doxycycline
Effexor
Eltroxin
ephedra
Ephedrine
fabiola
fabiola-qz
feechka
Fioricet
Fosamax
hananim
Hydrocodone
ionamin
kistov
klonopin
Larcik
Lexapro
Lipitor
Lortab
meridia
mimaxa
Norvasc
oxycodone
oxycontin
paxil
percocet
Phendimetrazine
Phentermine
Prednisone
Propecia
protonix
provigil
Prozac
Reductil
Ritalin
rohypnol
Sibutramine
Soma
Synthroid
tamadol
Topamax
Toprol
Tramadol
Ultracet
Ultram
Valium
Valtrex
verasova
Viagra
vicodin
Wellbutrin
Xanax
xenical
Zithromax
Zocor
Zoloft.
Zolpidem
Zovirax

As you can see, I listed 82 words. You might also notice that 98% of those words are names of drugs. Of course, this doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface. Spammers (crafty lot that they are) will bombard your comments boxes with links, keywords, and gibberish. And because they hardly use the same IP twice, banning IP addresses is useless. Furthermore, even though I could ban the several thousand IP addresses held within 25,000 comments, it just wouldn’t make sense in the long run. You see, Internet Service Providers sometimes use blocks of IP’s for their users and often rotate them on a regular basis. It’s not like any one person has the same IP over their lifetime…it’s not like a home address. I could ban a block of IP’s, but I might be blocking whole groups of people who aren’t spammers. Which might not be bad or rather, wouldn’t actually matter.

In all the 25,000+ comments that I moderated, there were only 4 that I approved. Two of which were questionable, but not so much that I would block them. It’s sometimes hard to tell. Spammers are sometimes real people who get paid to post links as much as they can, anywhere they can. They get paid via click-thrus. When someone clicks their specific link, they make something like 10 cents or something per click. I’m not sure how it works. It’s a shady business anyway. And because they realize there are people like me out there taking a stand, they’ve learned to become sneaky. One specific comment read:

[...] Cinka is very entertaining. Check out the latest and greatest post on Fly Home Like a Rock Star. See below for a quick excerpt of the entertainment: [...]

I found this example amusing. Made to look as though they were informing me that they’d linked back to a certain post. Which hopefully means I’ll approve the comment allowing them to comment more in the future, like an open door. The grand purpose of all this is to get web-traffic; which in turns means commerce.

So why don’t spammers stop spamming a particular site after they see they’re not making any headway? Because it doesn’t matter. The majority of SPAM is automated. I’m not certain of the logistics, but I do know that the method is computerized and the application doesn’t care if the comment gets approved. It’s job is to simply post, post, post. With hundreds of thousands of comments being sent out every day, if 10% don’t go through, they’re still ahead of the game. Thus, lowly bloggers such as myself simply have to deal with it. And even with bells and whistles, you can’t stop SPAM completely. You can hinder it slightly, but defense is the best offense. Vigilance and determination. Up until yesterday, I’d completely ignored my SPAM, but when you spend 4 hours wading through it, you tend to get a fire lit under your ass.

My 82 keyword blacklist will help, but as I reached the final 2000 comments, I realized that SPAMMERS also use common words you wouldn’t want to blacklist. Words we use everyday. Blacklisting everyday language would mean the two legitimate commenters wouldn’t be able to post anything. I don’t get a lot of comments here. I never have. In fact, with any regularity, there really are only two people who comment: My sister and Nevla. Even though I know more than two people read this blog, they’re the only ones who comment. Thanks guys! Makes me feel special. My blog is only mildly entertaining and not enough to drive in masses of traffic. I don’t know how I feel about that.

I receive an email every time a comment come in. WordPress holds unapproved comments in a queue until I can deal with it. I’ve cleared my inbox, I’ve cleared the queue. I’ve cleared the slate and can really start to get a handle on this. Of course, it’s a daily task. I’ll have to moderate SPAM everyday. I feel like Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid…I know I’m licked, but I’m going out in a blaze of glory.

TV on the Net and TV on the Radio

Posted on by
Reply

I’ve gotten rather blog-happy in the last few days. There must be a lot to talk about. That, or I have nothing better to do.

On that note, CBS has full episodes of old shows available for viewing. Free. Best of all, full episodes of Star Trek. Yeah boyeee! As if I wasn’t busy enough getting sprinklers fixed and setting up our new nifty auto-bottom-loading-water-dispenser. Along with their newest shows (booo), they also have The Twlight Zone, The Love Boat, The Beverly Hillbillies, Family Ties (LOL), and Twin Peaks – to name a few. This is just the thing I need to help me get through the Summer TV Blues while waiting for Heroes to start, which BTW starts in September *hap hap happy*

Oh! And check this out! If you like The Twlight Zone (as I do), since 2002, producer Carl Amari (I had to look him up) has been creating radio versions of Twilight Zone episodes. They’re already done 130 out of 156 and utilize the talents of some well known (and not so well known) actors including Jason Alexander, Luke Perry, Blair Underwood, Jane Seymour, Mayor Adam West, Stan Freberg (AJB should love that), John Ratzenberger, and tons more. What a nifty idea. It’s playing everywhere on various stations except Los Angeles, but apparently it’s also available on XFM. You can also download individual episodes for under a buck.

Along with that, Amari is also producing new Twilight Zone episodes – or radio dramas in the “style” of TZ. Rod would be proud. Actually, Rod might not want to do something as arcane as radio dramas, but I think he’d dig the irony. I’m gonna listen to some…’cause that’s how I roll.

Coffin Couches

Posted on by
2

At first I was like, “Coffin couches! Awesome!” and then I read the description:

We at Coffincouches.com have the mindset of thinking “Green” and we know it is different but we strongly believe in recycling. Our niche happens to be 18 gauge steel coffins which we collected from local funeral homes primarily in Southern California. It is a health and safety law that funeral homes cannot resell used coffins to the general public. We approached funeral directors with the attitude of recycling. These coffins are not used for burial due to slight cosmetic inconsistencies. They are reconfigured and modified resulting in a finished product – a unique one a kind coffin couch. If you notice (although it may be too small) the six cast iron heavy duty legs are embossed with the universal biohazard insignia. The reason we utilize this sign is because safety is our utmost concern. If you are not aware, once a human body is placed in a coffin it is considered biohazard tissue. The legs have the embossed insignia for precautionary reasons in the event body fluids are exchanged on these coffins. Perhaps you would feel safe knowing that you are in designated biohazard scene!
Ha!!

Several points to notice: Coffins are used. Legs are embossed with bio-hazzard symbol “for precautionary reasons in the event body fluids are exchanged on these coffins”

Seriously? I like the idea of recycling coffins, but don’t like the idea of sitting on a piece of furniture that once carried the remains of someone’s loved one. Um, because of the fluid leakage. WTF? How is this OK? And why would someone buy this? Yes, it’s a kick ass looking piece of furniture, but when they explain someone laid in it….just makes it grody and a whole lotta creepy.

Being Goth (as I am), you’d think I’d be alright with this idea. You know, death, funerals, etc. However, having attended my fair share of funerals in the past 4 years, it’s hard to think about the body that must have lay there. Who was it? How did they die? What did they die from? Is there fluid in the creases of the sofa?

While I’m sure the Coffin Couches company thoroughly cleans the piece before they sell it. Why then include the bio-hazard? Why warn people it might be an issue? I also don’t get the part where they say “Perhaps you would feel safe knowing that you are in designated biohazard scene! Ha!!” – what’s with the Ha!!? I don’t get it. Is that funny?

I guess I’ve lost my edge. I wouldn’t be able to watch my Thursday night NBC line-up sitting on something someone was dead (and possibly leaking) on.

Internet Zombie Movie

Posted on by
Reply

Repost from DarkCulture.Net

So there’s this really adorable girl on YouTube that, because she’s adorable and has created amusing videos, has a pretty large following. She goes by the name Paperlillies and has tons of fan-boys e-stalking her. Turns out, she’s come up with a really great idea for an internet film aptly titled “Internet Zombie Movie” and it’s been picked up by the BBC’s radar. The BBC won’t have anything to do with the film, but will showcase several websisodes of “the making of” and behind the scenes. The idea is that Paperlillies will create the film based on contributions from YouTubers and friends with completion by Halloween 2008. I expect it’s going to be a mish-mash of footage, hilarity, and entertainment. And it’s a totally new idea. Go figure. Who knew those existed anymore?

The BBC has set up an mini-site for the project, however, if you live outside the UK, apparently you can’t see it. What the? What’s up with that? The good news is, Paperlillies has set up her own YouTube page and you can catch BBC’s webisodes on their YouTube page. I’ll also post updates as they arise…from the grave. *ahem*

Links

Paperlilles @ YouTube
BBC Mini Site for Internet Zombie Movie
BBC @ YouTube
Internet Zombie Movie @ YouTube
Official Internet Zombie Movie Site

A Busy Week

Posted on by
1

So far, this week has been chock full of domestic tasks. On Monday the air conditioner repairman came. Thanks Gods. He was a tiny little man, probably in his 60′s. He looked more like a professor than a A/C repairman. He wore thin glasses that he constantly pushed down to the tip of his nose. He most likely needs bi-focals or transition lenses. His nose was characteristically Greek and I was fascinated by it. He looked like one of those people who you could tell was just gorgeous in their younger days. However, most impressively, he wore a floppy fishing cap upon which the letters N’SYNC were written. I guess it takes all kinds. What he did was a bit of a mystery, but the A/C works. He also upselled me on cleaning out the refrigerator motor – which, after he broke out the vacuum, I realized I could have done myself. $88 dollars worth.

Earlier in the day, the piano tuner showed up and got my piano sounding right again. It’s funny, I’ve been playing it for months and had actually gotten used to everything being out of key. Now that it’s right, I have to get used to it again. Of course, since it’s an old piano (if 1970 is old) is needs some new parts – that will eventually fail completely – and will need to be tuned again in about 6 months. The piano tuner, the “T” in T&S Piano Tuners, was a jolly fellow that talked a lot, but knew more about pianos than any person I’d ever met. He told me some nice history about my upright – that it was one of the last Yamaha models made with entirely wooden interior parts and that despite it being made in Japan, it was a good piano. I guess that makes a difference. He worked for several hours, checked and double checked, and impressed the hell out of me. I especially love working with people who like what they do.

Backtracking a bit, while the A/C N’SYNC fan was here, we ducked into the second basement looking for a switch box. Upon opening the doors, what did I find? Big heaping piles of rat crap. Yes. Rat crap. This means I have to now find an exterminator. I called the only humane trapper in the area (well, the only one I could find) and they told me they don’t trap rats, they kill them. Sure, they’ll trap raccoons, squirrels, and other animals of that nature, but not rats. I mean, why discriminate? Rats are animals all the same. Sure some carry disease and their excrement can cause respiratory infections, but kill them? I guess the point is, what do you do with an entire colony of rats? Set them free into the Arroyo so that they can return later? Rats have a bad rap. If Ratatouille taught me anything, it’s that everyone can cook. Even a rat. Naturally, I feel riddled with guilt about the prospect of killing dozens of rats. Traps or pesticides? It’s a horrible way to die either way. Thus, if I maintain my Buddhist-like mentality that I’m a lover not a fighter, I must find a better way to get the rats out of the house. I’d prefer to get them out humanely, allow them to live their little rat lives, except not in my walls. I’ve tasked AJB with the job of cleaning up the little rat poopies. What I find odd is that even the humane trapper won’t trap rats. I suppose it’s a waste of time on their part and it’s just easier to murder them. That’s not how I play. Extermination is a last resort.

And today, we’re getting three sprinklers fixed. Is my life exciting or what?

Shining

Posted on by
1

I’m pretty sure I posted this some time ago. A few years ago, like…3 years ago, The Association of Independent Creative Editors created a contest where people could submit re-cut trailers of movies to change them into a different story. The Shining won. I’m not sure what they won, but I’m sure it didn’t hurt the guy’s career any. At once point, I even had it loaded onto my MySpace page. Occasionally, I’ll look it up and watch it again.

This just always makes me so happy. Or it could be the industrial strength St. John’s Wort.

Pasadena Film Fest

Posted on by
Reply

As much as I hate the heat, I absolutely adore all the Summer film fests. Pasadena, in recent years, has raised the local bar and puts on several small film festivals around Old Town Pasadena. One Colorado, a courtyard surrounded by a douchey bar, Johnny Rockets, small boutiques, and strange public sculpture, plays old films on a large wall. You can sit and watch in set out seats, or glance up as you stroll by. This year, they’re doing a dedication to the lovely Audrey Hepburn. Could it be that I actually get to see Breakfast at Tiffany’s TWICE in one Summer? Holy cow! Yes!

As far as I know, these are all FREE to the public. Which helps. And look! Wars of the Worlds, Grease, Charade, My Fair Lady, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Sabrina (yay!!!), Mary Poppins (yay!!!), Roman Holiday, Seven Samurai, and an all night geek-fest for Lord of the Rings. Wow. I’m so, like, totally, excited! The Lord of the Rings all-nighter is until dawn and I’m assuming they’re going to show all 3 movies. So what kind of nerd will actually sit through 150 hours of Middle Earth mania? I bet there’s more than one. Of course, I’ll be at Comic-Con that weekend so I’ll be up to my pointed ears in nerddom and geekology. Hooray!

The only thing I don’t like about One Colorado is that the screen and seats are situated in a busy courtyard where the film competes with clanging dishes and touristy passersby. I’m also curious how they’re going to pull off the basement films – it’s about 3 levels below ground in a musty, dusty, dingy, parking garage…it’s also not very cool (temperature wise) down there. Should be interesting. At least something worth checking out.

The Old Pasadena Film Festival

FRIDAY, JULY, 11

8:30 PM
CLASSIC HEPBURN: BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY’S
One Colorado Courtyard, 41 Hugus Alley

10:00 PM
SCI FI: THE WAR OF THE WORLDS (1953)
School House Parking structure rooftop, 33 E. Green Street

SATURDAY, JULY, 12

8:30 PM
CLASSIC HEPBURN: MY FAIR LADY
One Colorado Courtyard, 41 Hugus Alley

FRIDAY, JULY, 18

8:30 PM
CLASSIC HEPBURN: CHARADE
One Colorado Courtyard, 41 Hugus Alley

10:00 PM
HORROR FILM: TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE
Basement of Schoolhouse Parking Garage, 33 E. Green Street

SATURDAY, JULY, 19

10:00 AM
FAMILY MATINEE: MARY POPPINS
Laemmle’s One Colorado Cinemas, 42 Miller Alley

8:30 PM
CLASSIC HEPBURN: SABRINA
One Colorado Courtyard, 41 Hugus Alley

FRIDAY, JULY, 25

8:30 PM
CLASSIC HEPBURN: ROMAN HOLIDAY
One Colorado Courtyard, 41 Hugus Alley

10:45 PM
CLASSIC FOREIGN FILM: SEVEN SAMURAI
One Colorado Courtyard, 41 Hugus Alley

SATURDAY, JULY, 26

GREASE with guest to be announced
22 Mills Place

8:30 PM till Dawn
LORD OF THE RINGS TRILOGY
One Colorado Courtyard, 41 Hugus Alley, Middle Earth

Social Networking Over Kill

Posted on by
Reply

When MySpace came along, I was confused and intrigued. Eventually, once I figured out how it all worked, I loved it. Nearly five years later, it’s still my primary social networking site. I’m on it just about everyday and it’s still my main form of catching up with pals and whatever else MySpace is used for; mostly time wasting. Granted, I’m not as obsessed as some people, but it keeps me entertained and I continue to enjoy using it.

With the onset of Friendster, MySpace grabbed the reigns. Because of their total and utter domination of the web, numerous other sites sprouted like weeds. Facebook, Flickr and far too many to name. Any site worth it’s salt had integrated social networking into it’s format. These days, you can’t have any kind of site without some form of social networking attached to it. Every site you “join” (or want vital information from) requires you set up a profile, post pictures, and add friends. As MySpace is my primary, unfortunately, the feeling is not mutual with many people I know. If they’re not on MySpace, they’re on Facebook. If they’re not on Facebook, they’re on Friendster…and so on and so on. Therefore, you’re faced with the problem of wanting to connect with certain friends, but if they’re not on your primary friends list…you end up going to where they are; even if it’s just to check it out. This leads to confusion and superfluousness. What friends are on which site? And what about the duplicates? My sister is on MySpace, Facebook, and Friendster as well.

It occurs to me that I have more than a few affiliations with social networking sites.

MySpace
Friendster
Facebook
Flickr
Yelp
Model Mayhem
Live Journal
Stumble Upon
Netflix (couldn’t figure out how to link my account)

…I bet there’s more. I’m just not thinking of any others at the moment.

As you can see, the ones that came to mind – I have at least EIGHT social networks. Granted, I don’t often visit Facebook and Friendster as much. Yelp is occasional. Flickr is a bullshit rip-off that allows people to steal your images. Sometimes I skulk around the photographer forums, but otherwise I don’t need the restrictions and can use my own site for image upload. Model Mayhem is work related, I hardly use LiveJournal anymore, I use StumbleUpon, but I don’t network, and Netflix…well, do I really want my friends knowing that last month I rented Land of the Lost Seasons 1 and 2? Maybe.

It’s too much. Having 50 different sites with 50 different sets of friends lists is overkill. Why must I network socially on my video rental site? Why do I have to SHARE everything with everyone? Well, the funny thing is, if you really want to get the word out about something, you must post on all your social networking sites. As I mentioned above, not everyone is on MySpace and not everyone reads this blog. I have friends that only read my MySpace blog…which is hardly ever updated. So what then? Do I really have to share everything with everyone all of the time? What’s the deal with that? What is this new concept of SHARING everything. That’s a funny comment coming from blogger, but I’m select about what I share. No, I guess that makes me a hypocrite. I blog, therefore I share. I share a lot. I like the concept of sharing, it’s something I was taught in kindergarten and growing up with two brothers and one sister. Furthermore, I like my friends and family knowing what’s going on in my life, but do I need 50 social networking sites to do it? I guess every other site is trying to out-MySpace Myspace.

As if that wasn’t bad enough…as if being FORCED to share everything wasn’t well and good, I recently found a site called Ning. Ning allows people to create their own networking sites. To use a phrase my 4 year old cousin Erika uses…what the? I did a rough count and using simple math, came to the conclusion that there are at least 1500 photography groups. WTF? Granted, a whole lot of these groups only have one member – the creator. Still. Why does everyone think they should have THEIR OWN social network? It’s ridiculous! I already have MySpace and 15 other social networking sites…why more? Why!!!

I’m about ready to go on a tangent about entitlement and how everyone thinks they’re unique snow flakes and that they deserve to have their own special networks. OK. One photography group. Two, maybe three, but 1500 or more? It’s overkill. OVERKILL says I! It’s just too much. The internet is already over saturated with groups and clubs and social things. Now we need more? We need our very own social networks? I become a dissenter, a mutineer, a malcontent because I just don’t get it.

I just don’t get it. I know I can stick to my own little MySpace and leave it at that. I don’t HAVE to sign up to every site under the sun, but the fact that they’re out there in droves bothers me. No, not bother…annoys. It takes away from the specialness that MySpace created and makes the concept of keeping in touch with friends diluted and cheap. Right, MySpace has it’s problems and it’s not perfect (it’s also owned by Rupert Murdoch), but it’s like a favorite pair of shoes: They fit, they’re comfortable, they still look pretty good, and they go with everything.

[INSERT CHARLIE BROWN STYLE FRUSTRATION HERE, THROW UP ARMS, AND WALK AWAY]

I Can Blog

Posted on by
Reply

I spun the wheel of blog archives and landed on October 2003. I often like to look back at random dates and remember where I was and what was going on. The thing is, in an effort to be discreet, over the years I’ve left out names and places. When I read entries from October 2003, I say things like “my boyfriend”, “My brother”, “my job” – Yeah, but which boyfriend? Which brother? Which job? I also noticed that I wrote a whole lot more whimsically. I used funny terminology and sayings. Perhaps it was a result of reading Catcher in the Rye. I liked the way Holden talked so inevitably I wrote a bit like him. Huh. I also went into a lot more detail about what was actually going on in my life. For example, what was on TV that night. I like that kind of stuff. It takes me back. And that’s the point. When I’m 80 years old I can look back at how cool I was. Or, I guess, how messed up I was. When I’m 80, I can say…see, back then I was messed up. Thank goodness I’ve figured things out.

Of course, my life has changed so dramatically from 2003 to now. Five years ago. Wow. Doesn’t it seem like longer? It does to me. So this whole anonymity thing with the names and dates…it bothers me that…well, for one, I can’t fucking remember what the hell was going on. Job? What fucking job? I’ve had about a million of them over the years. I guess what I’ve always felt is that by saying “boyfriend” I could simply look at the date and go, “Oh yeah! That dude!” – Alas, I really can’t. I suppose I could mull it over for a bit and eventually come to a conclusion, but that requires a whole lot more brain power than I’m willing to expend at the moment. Oh well. I suppose from now on I’ll use initials. That might help. I’ll let you know if it works in five years.

I also realized that I don’t listen to music like I used to. Five years ago all I ever did was listen to music. MP3′s were in constant rotation and I don’t think I ever turned it off. Maybe at night, but mostly, the music was playing. Hmmm. What’s up with that? I mean, I still listen to music, but not quite as obsessively. That needs to change. Me, shun the music? Never! *putting on ABBA now.

Alright. So what’s going on now? Today, like a lot of days, was hot and my energy was low. I’m at the ass end of a long, nasty flu and I feel like I’m still recovering. I practiced piano for a little over an hour today. If I haven’t mentioned, I’m teaching myself piano. It’s really hard. Well, note reading is. The thing is, I started about a month ago and I’ve actually gotten better so it gives me hope. I saw this cheesy show on public television the other day called “Learn Piano in a Flash” – the teacher was THE most annoying person on the planet, but he actually gave me some tips I’m using. Interesting huh? No, I know.

I hung up my eco-friendly wasp decoy nest today. Because it looks like a real wasp nest (sort of), it’s supposed to detract wasps and bees. We’ll see if it works. It beats wasp traps. I feel so bad…hey guys, here’s some delicious honey juice for you…oh! You’re trapped and you’re gonna starve to death. Sorry. I’m no killer. A bee got into the house the other day and I had to take decisive action. It was him or me. Bee stings can kill cats, so I decided to save my children and destroy the bee. I felt really bad. Especially since I didn’t kill him with the first whack. So yeah, I’d rather deter the wasps than kill them. Hey, I’m a nice person like that.

I’m hungry. Or am I? I feel like this is all really boring shit. Hanging up wasp decoys and practicing piano…WTF? Why aren’t I doing anything? It’s this ass end of the flu that’s got me down. Ah fuck, I do things, I guess. Maybe not blog-worthy, but I do stuff. Just not today.

BTW, this new layout doesn’t look awesome on the iPhone. Lame.